Thursday, January 1, 2015

“The time is now. The person is you.” - Nido R. Qubein


Where does the time go?  I feel like I was just blogging about the end of 2013 and now another year has passed.  Ferris Bueller was spot-on, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”  The older I get the speedier is goes, I swear, so cliché.  At any rate, a New Year is upon us and with that I’m feeling a sense of NEW, call it whatever you wish; a fresh start, square one, a new beginning or clean slate, the sphere we are on-board has completed a revolution around the sun again and the social order tells us that we have a new jumping off point.  Even though we all know that January first is really no different than December thirty first, something in our brains and our way of life tells us that after all the holiday mayhem, accomplishments, accolades, adventures, sadness and loss; the up and downhill battles from the past year are all behind us.  We wipe off the dry erase board and get a completely new white slate.  With that, I say take some time to mull over your 2014 and consider what you did right and wrong, so that with your 2015 start from scratch, you can build on your over and done with experiences and make 2015 worthier than you can imagine!

When I flipped over my daily quote calendar this morning, I read the last quote of 2014 and Nido R. Qubein was quoted saying, “The time is now.  The person is you.”  Short and sweet, simple is always best and on the cusp of the New Year, no words are truer.   We are at square one, how will you fill your 2015, and what do you want for yourself?  I know that I’ve said it before and truth be told, I mean it, resolutions are for the birds.   No one sticks to them and when we fail at them, which inevitably happens, we dishearten ourselves, making it unattainable to live up to our idealistic hopes.  That is not the foundation I wish for my new year, I don’t know about you?  So there will be NO resolutions here from me but there will be GOALS.   I am establishing some goals for myself, goals that might take all of 2015 and beyond to complete but targets that I will set into motion, in this coming year.  Stand with me and resolve to throw out the resolutions, instead make plans to make yourself the person you want to develop into, not the person you want to be the first few weeks of the New Year.  Let’s face it we all need to get our butts up off the couch, exercise and live a much less gluttonous lifestyle.  You can still do that, just take time to look a little deeper this New Year and figure out a longer term plan for a happier, healthier you.
If I was to reflect on the former year and take Ferris’s advice to look around, I would say 2014 was a typical year; but one thing that I can say I’m proud of and stands out from my 2014, are all the family adventures we were so fortune to have undergone. Family escapades and travel are always near and dear to my heart.  It’s so enjoyable to spend quality time with my husband and daughter.  With all the demands of normal life, school activities, work and the amount of electronic devices we have in the house, it’s not always simple to stay connected on a daily basis and I find that a nice getaway brings us back to where we need to be.  In my mind, getting out of our normal daily grind is essential for my family’s survival and in 2014 we did it up pretty good. 
We embarked on yet another cruise in the Caribbean, the southern Caribbean this time, and had the good fortune to visit stunning countries like Aruba, where we off-roaded through a national park, explored bat caves and natural pools.  The island of Curacao was breathtaking.  We explored the local charms and way of life while we ate watermelon in the streets fresh from an authentic open air market, alongside the locals who were making a living panhandling with the local flare of Curacao’s music.  The Dominican Republic was where my daughter was able to see that “clothing optional” at the beach is NORMAL in other parts of the world.  Many may disagree with this parenting style but it’s a good thing I don’t really care what you think.  I feel if you don’t make a big deal about it, it’s not a big deal.  As a mother I love to show my daughter that there are so many different ways to live and the way we live is NOT always right or the only way.  It’s a great life lesson, as far as I’m concerned.  In Tucks and Caicos, we took in some snorkeling, had a remarkable catamaran adventure along the exquisite coastline and just soaked up Mother Nature’s rays.  
We road tripped the whole way to Miami from New York in our trusty mini-van, with grandparents in tow and we lived to tell about it.  An adventure we will never be able to duplicate.  We left sunny NY to find the south buried in snow and ice.  Never before have I traveled south to frostier wintery meteorological conditions and southern states that were completely shut down, it was a first!  While in Florida we took time out to learn all about American Space exploration at the Kennedy Space Center, and learned everything soup to nuts, and it did not disappoint.  Last month my husband and I were able to sneak off to Jamaica for some much needed R&R, giving us a moment to remember we are married adults and not just parents.  I would recommend this to everyone; it does WONDERS for your mental health!  We tried our luck camping, a few times in the summer, with friends, in the picturesque Adirondack Mountains, had a nice family of bears over for a campfire and enjoyed tent camping (ok, enjoyed might be a stretch and that nice family of bears made me pee my pants but I’m not holding a grudge).  
In 2014, we ventured away from our rural roots and explored two major northeast cities, Washington DC and New York City; I love to discover all that cities have to offer.  Washington DC is such a gem, one of my favorite cities; and we saw it all; monuments, documents, memorials, parks, cemeteries, bridges, statues, tributes, museums, public transportation and all the national treasures you can imagine.  I’m pretty sure I learned more in the few days there than I did in all of my history classes pooled together. 
New York City at Christmas time is truly one of those things everyone should do at least once.   The magic of Christmas is alive in NYC; we took in as many sights of the season as we could, even stopping into Macy’s and riding the wooden escalators for a visit with SANTA, which was a genuine highpoint of the trip (seeing the magic of Christmas still alive in my daughter’s eyes was priceless and I hope to never forget that moment).   I feel proud to say that we were able to give our 9 year old the ability to encounter the urban culture of the world that ONLY a place like New York can offer.  I have to laugh because when you ask my daughter what her favorite part of NYC was she isn’t going to say going to the top of the Empire State building which we did and enjoyed, but instead she will say, seeing the dancing scantily clad dressed cross-dressing man performing a risqué show, on the subway platform.  Like I said “CULTURE,” and I’m not sure it makes me a good mom or not but in a strange way I’m happy to have been able to share that experience with her.  I always say to her, it takes all kinds to make up our world and it’s nice for her to see firsthand the truth in that statement and that there is a place in this world for everyone.  It’s all these nuggets that I love to share with my family because they are the ones that make the impressions in our minds that last a lifetime.  I hope when my family looks back on our 2014 adventures, we always reminded of how lucky we were to share them together.  My goal for the future is that we are able to continue our journeys, share new experiences and take Ferris’s advice to remember to look around.  Remember we are only given a short time with our kids before they grow up, I am pleased to say that my husband and I are showing our daughter as much of the world as we can, hopefully molding her mind to see that it’s a big world out there.  My hope is that she will grow into a remarkable adult someday that appreciates all life has to offer, while accepting differences throughout the world.  Ok, maybe that was a little too deep but it’s a goal!
A game charger this year for me was when I started to take back my health again, trying to remember what it feels like to feel good.  I dropped 20lbs the old fashioned way and have never felt better.  I accomplished the feeling even if it was short lived.  I know in my heart that I will get there again and it is going to be my mission in 2015 to continue what I once started.   As you may or may not know, my health took a turn for the worse in the last few months (I have IBD – Ulcerative Colitis for 8 years now) and I will not sugar coat things, it has been awful, dare say, one of the largest tests of my life. Without going into details, I will say it has knocked me down, kicked me around and tried to destroy me, but I WILL NOT LET IT WIN!  Even in the darkest times, and it feels like there have been many recently, I have learned that I am SO MUCH STRONGER than I ever thought I could be.  The power of positive energy, no matter how hard it is to find, will put you in the right direction every time.  I’m still struggling to get myself out of this tailspin, but I am clawing my way out with medicines and will-power every day. 

I have been on a slew of medications recently, all with so many side effects, I am no longer sure if my symptoms are from my disease or the medications.  I have done much sole searching and reflecting recently that I know that I’m ready for a change.  The most important goal for me in 2015 is to be much less dependent on medication, with the hope of completely getting rid of them from my medicine cabinet.  I am aware that this will take a huge commitment on my part, doing things I would have never imagined.  I guess that is why we should NEVER say NEVER!  You never know what life is going to throw at you, stay open to all the options life has.  The last few months have taught me that I no longer want to be on this Merry-Go-Round of maintaining my disease with medicine.  My ride is over and I want off!  Medicine is helpful and necessary for many, so please don’t get me wrong, it’s just not for me right now.  Our society is so consumed with instant gratification that we want a pill to fix things and fix things now, when in reality that is just not how it works.  I am ready to get out of the mindset that all doctors have the answers and drugs are the only way.  I am looking forward to NOT blindly following like a zombie what society says you have to do.  So here’s to my health and to no medicine in 2015, wish me luck!
A silver lining from all of unhealthy madness I have endured has been the fact that I have reached out to many new support groups of people online that are facing similar and even more serious IBD problems than myself.  While doing this, as to find support for myself, I have found that my voice is important and I am very much enjoying helping others through their struggles, it has been very rewarding.  Giving is always better than receiving, it’s true.   A further goal moving forward in the New Year for me will be take a much larger role in being an advocate for Crohn’s Colitis awareness and finding a cure for this horrible autoimmune disease, maybe this is the year we beat this?  Let’s hope.
Each January first we are all presented with a new tabula rasa (blank slate) to make things right.  I’m sure this New Year will bring hardships alongside the wonders because life is filled with Ying and Yang.  To have encouraging experiences we all must endure some undesirable ones to balance out life.  Let’s hope the positive outweigh the negative in 2015 and we come out of all of our experiences for the better. My aim for 2015 is incredibly basic, just like the citation I read this morning, right here and right now, I’m going to just simply, keep on keeping on. Keep plugging away at my recent and continued ambitions.  It may take a year or it might take a day but what is meant to be will always find a way.  I aspire to make sure 2015 is another interval of growth, as I hope I do with each given year.  We flourish so as to discover our purpose, on this rock that voyages around the sun.  You get 365 new days; look at them as 365 new chances to get to where you are intended to be. In this coming year, I hope to never get stagnate, continually shifting my thoughts and the way I look at my existence, so that I can continue to evolve and develop into the best me I can be.  This New Year means nothing if you stay stuck in your comfort zone, push yourself to do things you would never imagine and continue to figure out what your purpose is, because you are here for a reason, figure out what that is.   So the time is NOW, you are in the driver’s seat, the flag has been waved, what are you going to do in 2015?  Ready, set, GO!