“Don’t compare yourself to others compare yourself to the person from yesterday." - Unknown

I must say I’m a little scared (ok, maybe not a little), I’m freaking out.  I recently signed up and paid to run my first 5K, not only is it a 5K race but there is an obstacle course within it.   What was I thinking?   If you have read my past blogs you would know I how much I hate to run and how out of shape I am but how I really want to prove to myself that I can do it.  So the countdown is on, 10 weeks and counting.  I’m not an anxious person by nature, but I don’t think I can remember a time when I felt this far out of my comfort zone and all I have done is sign up.   Is 10 weeks really enough time?  Oh no, here comes the anxiety again!

So the plan is to run with my husband and a bunch of friends, which should make me feel better, right?  NOPE!  They are all seasoned runners besides my husband and I, which is a little daunting at this point.  I’ve been trying to get some other non-runner friends to join us but for the most part they laugh at me and tell me they will route me on and meet me at the finish line.  My one friend said, “You want me to pay to make a fool of myself?”   Then I got thinking, oh my god, that’s exactly what I have done.

With all the negative garbage going on in my head and the feeling of being so far out my own wheel house, I found this quote by some unknown and thought it was fitting. “Don’t compare yourself to others compare yourself to the person from yesterday.”  I know in my heart that it really doesn’t matter who else runs in this race only that I have challenged myself to complete something I’ve never done before.  Even if it involves crawling across the finish line in the very last place, I will be so much better than the person I was the day before.   As I wrap my head around this whole thing, I must remember that I can do it.  So today is the beginning, no more excuses.   I am officially starting to train for this thing.  My sneakers are all laced up and ready to go.

Why do we always compare ourselves to others?   I think most people want to be validated and comparing ourselves to others gives us the ability to gauge how “normal” we are.   I’ve always been a little different, but who can say what’s normal.  I know that I have looked at people around me for validation but I think I have tried to pave my own path and if I’m going to follow someone, I like to put a little twist to it.  So, as I follow (and I will be following not leading) my friends in this upcoming race, I ‘m going do it my way with a little twist, be myself and just have a blast doing it.  I hope that you all can think of something that challenges you, step outside your comfort zone and make yourself better than the day before.

So, the entry fee has been submitted, I have promised my friends I will be running and now I’ve told all of you.  There is NO turing back now.  So even though my brain is still screaming, “ARE YOU CRAZY,” there is a tiny bit of pride trying to peek out from all the doubt.   I know that this will be one of the biggest accolades, in my life, because I’m pushing my envelope and doing something that scares the ever living shit out of me.  Since this is a personal challenge, I hope that over the next 10 weeks the pride will start to show itself more and the doubt will go away.  I will keep you posted on my progress and let you know if I make it across the finish line.  My goal isn’t to keep up with all the others, it’s to be a little better than I was yesterday and do that for 10 weeks.  I just hope I won’t need a defibrillator  at the finish line.